Help! My child loves music and sings all the time, I am the most unmusical person on earth, what should I do for my young student?

This is a question that parents ask me on a weekly basis.  Two unmusical parents have no idea what to do with their young child that sings constantly and loves music!  They want to guide their child and give them every opportunity.  My husband and I are professional musicians, and here is what we would do for our own kid.  By the way, my parents are not the most musical either, and I found my own way.   If you don't do everything perfectly, it is okay.  Do what you can.

1.  Start piano lessons.  I have written another blog on why I, as a voice teacher, highly recommend piano for all young students.  You can read it below.  If you do nothing else, start a combo singing/piano lesson for your child with a knowledgeable teacher.  This is the most important thing you could do for your elementary age student.  If you do nothing else, start a 30 minute piano lesson once a week.  Practice five to ten minutes a day.  

2.  Join choir at church or school.  This education is usually free, and can teach your child how to better read and understand music, expose your child to different types of music, and improve their ability to sing with others in unison and in parts.  Many churches no longer have children's choirs, but the church where I am a music director, La Jolla Presbyterian, has a wonderful children's choir program.   Singing in a choir also gives your young student more performance experience.

3.  Perform at recitals and talent shows and local competitions.  The earlier you start your young student performing, the less likely they will have a case of terrifying stage fright as they get older.  Performance takes practice.  My students who have been through five recitals in the last two or three years are markedly, noticeably better than the rookies.  Give your child a chance to build their on-stage resume, and improve their talent.  Performance is confidence-building, and it allows your young student to face and overcome their nervousness and fears.  

4.  Get involved in children's theater.  Performing in local children's theater can be a fabulous educational experience for young children.   It teaches them the ups and downs of auditions, how to put together a scene and work together, and the rewards of performance after working hard.  

5.  Expose your child to different types of music.  Buy a classical or ethnic music CD.   Take your child to see a professional show or symphony.  Listen to the music first, so that it is familiar to them.  Children often think that they don't like something that is simply unfamiliar.  Once it becomes familiar, they like it.  Have them listen to jazz, classical, latin, bluegrass, or anything else that they might not be normally exposed to.  Heightening their sensory experience with music will open up their own personal potential.   Use music to signify different daily rituals. Play soothing classical music during rest times, and upbeat music while doing chores.  Find music to celebrate different times of the year, holidays, or to commemorate special events.   Make up songs about anything that is happening around you.  

6.  Learn to participate in music yourself.  If you show self-consciousness about participating in music your child will pick up on that.  Even if you don't consider yourself a considerable talent, learn to sing, make up silly songs, or play a simple instrument (tambourine or shaker works just fine!).  Your child learns best from you, so if you show the willingness to participate without embarassment, your child will too.  Our culture has made us judge musical talent quite harshly.  American idol has all made us mentally put ourselves in front of Simon every time we try and do something musical.   It does not need to be this way.  You are not auditioning to sing on national television.  Everyone can participate with music in some way.  It is not a crime to sing or play and not be a talented virtuoso.  That is how you learn.  If your child never has the confidence to try and sing or play, they will never learn.  If they see you trying, they will try too.  

7.  Let them build their confidence through music.  Any child can learn to have music proficiency, and if you encourage them to learn and practice, they will feel pride in their accomplishments.  It will also strengthen their performance in school and set them up for music appreciation and involvement for their whole life.